Another Trip to the Emergency Room

By superbriscoe

This is the second section to the events of July 8th 2008.

Soon it was decided that Andrew would need further medical attention.  So Andrew, Court, and Dad got in the truck went to the Emergency Room.  Andrew hobbled in, as people looked on amused, or so he thought.  They check in at the receptionist desk and then Dad left to run some errand in town.  Sitting nearby was an elderly woman bleeding considerably from her leg.  She refused help from the receptionist and all of the sudden got up, supposedly to go to the bathroom.  So off she went, leaving her first trail of blood of the night, but certainly not her last.

Andrew was called back and he and Court went to the patient room and the nurse asked what was wrong.  Andrew listed the injuries and exchanged his shirt for one of those remarkably flattering hospital gowns.  They began cleaning him up, and then he got wheeled off to have x-rays taken of his feet and ankles.  As he was there, he heard a disturbance from the next room over.  It was none other than Ms. Crazy Elderly.  “Don’t move your leg.” “No, put that down”  “I need you to keep you leg very still”   “We can’t do these xrays if you don’t stop moving”  This went on for a full five minutes or so.  The xrays were finished and Andrew got wheeled back to his room.  As he was positioned he looked out into the hallway and lo and behold, there was a complete trail of very bloody footprints.  The nurses and staff were working to clean it up as quick as they could.

The doctor came in and gave Andrew the results of the xrays.  “Your right ankle is just sprained pretty badly, and your left foot is pretty suspicious.  I want to get a CT scan on it so that we can be sure of what we have.”  So a few minutes later, in comes a cool dude: facial hair, giant earings, funnily fitting hospital clothes, you get the picture.  He wheels Andrew off to the CT room and tells him “Okay I am going to need you to switch into this other platform. “  He wouldn’t let him take the one step to switch, but instead took the time to manuever the beds to touching. “I’m not going to have you walk at all, because if the doctor is having you do a CT, then something is screwed up in there.”  So there he was for what seemed like forever and then got wheeled back to the room. Soon our elderly friend came wandering out again, complaining to the staff that the doctor was taking too long.  They guided her back to her room for the last time. So, goodbye Elderly Loon.  After a few moments, the Tech, a youngish man comes in and finishes treating the scrapes across the back.   Then, several of the most choice moments of all.  “Has your hand been cleaned up yet?”  “Nope it still hasn’t”  So he squirts some local pain killer on it.  ” Rub that in, and then go scrub it in the sink.”  Andrew looked over his shoulder and found the sink to be about ten feet away.  “You’ve got to be flippin’ kidding me,” he thinks to himself.  Instead of straight obedience, he just pulls the little cart over and uses the solutions and gauze pads to get that cleaned off.  The Tech came in again and explained to Court how she should take care of Andrew’s wounds.   “You should probably put neosporin on his scrapes about twice a day, and if they start to scab up, wash them in 50/50 hydrogen peroxide/water.  Both Andrew and Court kind of smirked because of the hilariousness of it.

The doctor came back in, puts some staples in Andrew’s head and then left again.  A moment later he was back.  “Did you hear anything about your CT scan results?” “Nope” says Andrew as he thinks “Flip, I’m toast.  My foot is destroyed.”  “Okay.  There are at least 4 broken bones down there, so I am going to have you go see the Orthopedic Surgeon to figure out what to do about it.  But for now we’ll get you a splint and a brace so that the swelling can go down.”  So they did all of that.  And Andrew was free to hobble out of there on the crutches.  They found Dad in the lobby, working on his computer and headed home.  That was the excitement of the day.

To Make Things Exciting:

1.   Normally when people sprain there ankles, they get crutches to keep the weight off of them.  Instead I am told I can’t put any weight on the other foot, so therefore my sprained ankle, becomes my “good” foot.

2.  Right where you are supposed to hold onto the crutch, my hand is all scraped up and hurts to touch anything, let alone put your weight on it.

3.  I discovered that the most convenient way to move around my bedroom was crawling.  However, my left knee is bruised pretty badly, so even that hurts.

4.  Being bedridden isn’t fun enough.  If you are considering it, I recommend also scraping your back significantly, so that any movement whatsoever makes those hurt.

4b.  Also, to make it even funner to ride your bed, make sure that you don’t cut your head open on the side of your head, but do it straight in back, right where you would like to lie your head down.  Just like that.  Perfect

5.  What a joke.  “When you do go to work, you need to keep both of your feet elevated”  How in the world are you supposed to pull that one off.

6.  As we were coming home, we ran over a nail and the horse trailer has a flat tire.

That is all.

What an exciting night.

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